our angel ..

what a day ..
just woke up .. well actually. i did not sleep maybe i did ... but just a nap ..

its because of our angel.. shes been up all night from 8pm till 5am .. crying and everything .. we've checked her pamperrs to see if shes already wet .. but shes not . in fact i remember changing her diapers for like 5 minutes ago ..

i fed her with milk because i think she's hungry .. she finishes it all and yet shes still crying.. we dont know why .. she cries like shes up to something .. we cant understand her because she cannot talk .. we don't know whats wrong with her ,,

i feel pity for our angel because she cannot tells us whats going on .. i think that night, shes into some pain .. where it is? i don't know .. her head .. tummy ..

i don't have any idea ,, she keeps on banging her head to the crib .. its not the first time that this situation happens .. it always happens but we can handle it .. but this night .. myy god!! i don't know what to do .


i gave her PHENOBARBITAL because im afraid that she will have her seizure .. every night she usually takes this one around 9pm .. together with DEPAKENE .

back to what happened last night .. since we don't know what to do .. i go inside the crib .. hug her .. that's what she always wanted .. she wants us to be with her .. i've been in the crib from 10pm up to 4 pm i think .. hugging her tight .. she would just moars .. like gagrr .. like playing with her saliva ..

that's what just she wanted .. she ants us to hold her ..
maybe she wants to feel our body close to her ..
she did not sleep .. but she keep quiet ,,.


hayys .. >_< im sad now .. because i just remember what the doctor said that she isnt normal and god can get her anytime he wants,,

im just scared .. to scared to wake up one day , that my angel isnt there anymore :(